Cum to My Window
by angelsinstead
Summary: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap operas and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only! *Adult Content*
1. A Cock to Remember

**Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap operas and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!  
**

 _*~A Cock to Remember ~ Zoe, Kyle and Madison (Season 3 of American Horror Story)~*  
_

Madison Montgomery had built him out of the spare parts she had taken from the mutilated bodies of several fraternity brothers. The unfortunate young men had been killed in a fatal bus crash. After she was finished, the resurrected man had the head of Kyle Spencer, but Zoe and Madison weren't sure whose penis their creation had obtained.

"Wow, what a big cock he has!" Madison exclaimed as the man made of up of sewn-up parts laid on a steel bed in the morgue where she and Zoe had reanimated him.

Zoe Benson was looking him up and down, searching for any traces of Kyle Spencer, the man she had fallen in love with at first sight when she and Madison had gone that night to a frat party. "I don't think that penis belongs to Kyle!" Zoe gasped as it was Madison who had stitched the various body parts together in a gruesome surprise for her friend. Both had been studying at an academy for young witches. It had been a spell that had brought the dead man back to life.

"How would you know what his penis looked like? You never fucked him, did you?" Madison asked incredulously. "I picked the BEST one!"

Zoe couldn't argue with that statement. It really was an impressive penis - a cock to remember! She had only seen one other cock in her 19 years of life and it had been fairly small- puny in comparison to the heavy schlong that lay between the muscular legs of their masculine creation.

"Well, don't you want to give it a whirl?" Madison asked Zoe as she was staring at the Frankenstein-like man's gradually hardening member.

Kyle's eyes came open and he found two lovely young women staring at his nude body, their eyes fixated on his semi-erect cock. "It's growing!" Zoe said in amazement.

"It's _alive_!" Madison gasped. "I totally think you should FUCK it!"

Zoe couldn't stop herself. She stripped off her long, shapeless black dress and tossed it to the floor. She then slid out of her damp panties, placing the crotch of the fabric against Kyle's face, just over his widening nostrils. Suddenly his cock hardened immensely. It was sticking straight up from the nest of his dark-blond pubic hair as though it were just begging to be fucked.

"This is a morgue," she said in a half-hearted protest as she climbed onto the table, placing her medium-sized, pink-tipped breasts against Kyle's face as well. He was licking one her nipples with his seeking tongue as she aligned her body with his, until his cock-head was pressing against her moist center.

"You need to test that cock out and see if it's working properly," Madison said as she too longed to join in on the fun.

She unzipped her own dress, dropping it on the tile floor that had been splattered with the blood of the bus crash victims. She didn't seem to mind as she too joined Zoe and Kyle on the slippery steel table, their naked bodies twisting and turning in some sort of erotic - but yet grotesque threesome.

"Ohhh!"

Zoe let out a gasp as Kyle's cock seemed to have a mind of it's own. He raised his hips, sending his member into her warm, wet cavern. He was inside her so deep that for a moment, she forgot to breathe.

Madison was grabbing Zoe's breast and kissing her as Zoe and Kyle began to fuck. Their bodies were damp with sweat and embalming fluid as Zoe began to move up and down on Kyle's stiffening appendage.

"I'm cumming!" she cried out in joy.

She had totally forgotten that her last orgasm had killed a man. He had died of an aneurism while he was fucking her. His death had been one of intense pleasure and also horrifying pain.

Kyle let out a guttural cry as he too was reaching ecstasy, spilling his seed deep into Zoe's receptive body. Could a dead man manage to create life? After all, he had been resurrected from the bodies of several corpses. Was there any more life that could be brought forth from so much calamity and destruction?

Madison continued to give Zoe kinky kisses as her lover/friend came down from the high of her orgasm. "Wow, you came soooo hard!" Madison said with glee. "I am totally glad I made that bus crash... AND that I made this boy-toy from all the dead bodies! He has an amazing cock, doesn't he?"

Zoe, who was still atop Kyle, looked at Madison with a disturbed expression. How could her friend (now lover) be so blase about the fact that Kyle had been killed and his head was now sewn atop the body parts of his various fraternity brothers? Kyle hadn't even been one of the guys who gang-raped Madison that fateful night. Kyle had been innocent!

"You killed Kyle, the man I loved... and because of what you did, his body was mutilated," Zoe said as she carefully disengaged herself from the man lying upon the lab table. "Whoever I just fucked; I am not even sure if it was Kyle. It has Kyle's face... definitely Kyle's. But who's _really_ in there?"

After both women spoke, they turned their gaze onto the man who was struggling to regain his breath. He was staring back at them, completely speechless. He appeared to have heard them, but he was unable to communicate.

"Say something!" Madison said to him desperately.

He worked his lips, but nothing was happening. Then he let out a sound that sounded half-way between what had to be a screech and a strange and somewhat lustful moan. Zoe and Madison looked down to see that as he was crying out, he was also fondling his immense, throbbing hunk of meat.

"He's horny again!" Madison observed. "Let _me_ climb on!"

She pushed Zoe to the side. "Let me RIDE that boy-toy!" Madison exclaimed.

A morgue worker came in, seeing two gorgeous, naked young women making love to what appeared to be a corpse. He fainted straight away.

As he fell to the floor, Madison didn't even seem fazed by the man's intrusion. She was furiously fucking her sexy, stitched-up creation.

"Ohhh his cock! _His cock_! It's sooooo big!"

"It certainly IS a cock to remember," said Zoe as she watched the scene of lust play out before her eyes.

Just exactly WHAT _had_ Madison created? And what horrors would be soon to follow?

Was it possible that they would become impregnated by their horny creation?! 


	2. The Bride's Twins

**Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap opera and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!**

 _*~The Bride's Twins ~ Natalie Buchanan and the twins (One Life to Live)~*_

She was bubbling with excitement on her wedding day. As her mother, Victoria Lord Buchanan and her aunt, Nora Buchanan helped her get prepared for the ceremony, Natalie put lilac-scented powder on both of her beautacious breasts. Besides her gorgeous eyes and gleaming red hair, her twins were known as her greatest asset.

"Ohhhh I am soooo excited!" Natalie gushed. "Today I am getting _married_."

"We're so happy for you, honey!" Vicki said as she and Nora gave Natalie lots of loving hugs.

Natalie's dad, Clint arrived to walk her down the aisle. Natalie was bouncing up and down in excitement and so were her immense jumbos. "I can't wait to be Mrs. Brody Lovett!" she cried out as Clint took her arm.

After the music had started and her aunt and mother had been seated, Clint lead his daughter into the ceremony. That's when Natalie added, "ALSO Mrs. John McBain!"

Natalie was pregnant and she wasn't sure which one of her lovers was the father, so she decided to marry not only Brody... but also John. Brody had discovered that he and John were actually twins. John was his brother from another mother! "No wonder I love fucking BOTH of you!" Natalie had gushed when she had heard the news.

Natalie walked down the aisle on her father's arm. She was glowing with pregnancy as both of the grooms waited for her at the altar. "You look absolutely beautiful, Natalie," John said in a sexy voice as he stood on her left side, next to her left jumbo.

Brody too grinned when Natalie reached the altar and stood between him and John. He cuddled up to her right jumbo as the minister began to speak. "Do you men take this woman and her massive jumbos as your lawfully wedded bride?" asked Reverend Carpenter.

"Yes, we both do," John stated as Brody slipped the ring on Natalie's finger.

After the ceremony ended, John and Brody took turns kissing Natalie. Brody caressed her growing baby bump as John pressed his face in between her bountiful bosoms. After many kisses and caresses, it was time for their kinky honeymoon.

Vicki and Clint said goodbye to their baby girl. "We love you, Natalie ~ my darling," Vicki said.

"Take care of my daughter and her jumbos," Clint said to Natalie's new husbands.

"In sickness and in health," Brody promised.

After leaving the church, Brody and John took Natalie to the Palace Hotel to make love to her all night long. "I get the left jumbo!" John cried out as he jumped into the bed with his bride.

"That's alright. I'm kind of partial to the right one," Brody said with a smirk as he began unlacing the bodice of his wife's wedding gown.

Soon, her immense jumbos spilled out. "Ohhh myyyy God!" John said as he buried his face in them. They smelled like fragrant flowers!

"I love you and your jumbos," he said. "The Twins!"

"I love you both, too... so much!" she said with a smile, pulling John and Brody into her arms.

All night long, they fucked and sucked. In the morning, Natalie woke up in between her new husbands. "I am in labor!" she cried out. "Take me to the hospital."

The three hurried to get dressed. Natalie didn't even bother lacing up her fancy wedding gown. They had to hurry because her water had broke and her contractions were already three minutes apart.

"I can't hold the baby in any longer!" she screamed.

"Brody, stick your hand down there and try to hold it in!" John commanded as he lifted Natalie into his arms and carried her toward the nearest elevator.

"No problem," Brody quipped. "My hand has been 'down there' most of the night!"

John chuckled. "All of our parts have been down there... as well as everywhere else."

He was winking at his brother from another mother as they got their pregnant bride into the elevator.

"Ohhh God! It's _coming_!" Natalie hollered.

"Who's coming?!" John asked.

"The- the-the baby!" Natalie said in pain.

While Brody's hand was 'down there', he felt something the size of a small watermelon about to emerge. "Hurry!" he said to John who was pushing buttons in the elevator. "I don't think this kid's gonna wait!"

Suddenly, a squalling baby was delivered into Brody's hands. It was crying at the top of it's lungs the minute the elevator opened at the lower level of the hotel. "I just had a baby!" Natalie said in awe.

A lot of people were looking as John lay Natalie down on a fancy settee in the hotel's lobby. "Holy shit! Another kid is coming out!" he exclaimed as Natalie began pushing again.

He was watching as a second newborn emerged. "Twins!" he said as he reached out for the child who had just been born.

"We have twins," Natalie said happily as she saw both of her husbands holding an infant.

"A boy and a girl," Brody said as he inspected the babies more closely.

"I am naming the boy Brody John," Natalie said as she looked at the little boy John was holding.

Then she gazed lovingly at her daughter who was in Brody's arms. "And our daughter's name will be Nora Victoria... after my aunt and my mother."

"I love the names. But why not John Brody?" John asked as he pouted.

"Because Brody John sounds better," Brody spoke up.

"I can't believe it! I just had twins. I am a twin... I married twins... and _I_ just had twins," Natalie stated.

"I am in love with YOUR twins," John said as he lay his dark head upon her immense jumbos.

"Will somebody _please_ call the hospital?!" Brody cried out.

The babies were fussing. Somehow he had ended up holding both of their offspring. The twins wanted to nurse, but John was hogging up their means of nourishment.

"Hey, can we get a bottle over here?" he asked a passerby who was gawking. "Aaaa... can you make that TWO bottles?!"

 **The End**


	3. Confessions of a Screamer

**Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap opera and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!  
**

 _*~Confessions of a Screamer ~ Tea & her many lovers (One Life to Live)~*  
_

 **Confession One: I scream in pleasure as I have kinky, spectacular sex with my gorgeous husband.  
**

My husband, Victor Lord, is such a wild tiger in bed ... and _out_ of it. Actually, we hardly ever make love in our bed. Our favorite places to have sex are the coffee table in our living room, the waterslide at the public pool, a park bench, our favorite restaurant, crowded courtrooms, elevators, etc. Basically, we'll have wild, sweaty sex almost anywhere! Last night, after a tasty dinner, we were both horny, so we fucked against the wall in our mansion's foyer. I screamed in delight as he plunged his thick piece of meat over and over into my body as he had me pinned up against the wall. I screamed so loud that my husband's body guard must have heard me having an orgasm. He came running to see if anyone was injured.

"Is everything okay in here?" asked Sean as Victor continued to pound deep and hard into my cum-soaked body.

I was too busy screaming so Victor replied, "Everything's just fine, Sean. I'm just fucking my wife."

"The lady is a screamer," Sean said under his breath, but I could tell he was checking me out... _Totally_. He wanted some of tantalizing Tea - I could tell. And I wanted a piece of him as well. So after my wild romp with my excessively horny husband, we cuddled on the couch and Victor fell asleep. I kissed his cheek and walked out. It was time for an over-due rendezvous with Victor's right-hand man.

 **Confession Two: I try to hold back the screams as I have sex with my husband's bodyguard ... but I do not succeed.  
**

I slipped outside completely naked toward the garden shed, nonchalantly humming a sexy tune. Sean happened to be outside, roaming the premises, looking for any potential predators that might be coming to harm my husband. "Ohhh hi," I said, completely startling Sean as he saw me standing in the moonlight in the garden in my full naked glory.

"T-Tea," Sean said in a little gasp. "What are you doing outside... and without any clothes on?"

I ran my hand seductively up and down Sean's sexy chest, giving him a smouldering look. "You were all alone out here in the dark... without any lemonade or any sort of refreshment. I thought I would come out here... and ummm... see if there was anything you might possibly need," I said in a purr.

As my hand made it's way down to his crotch, I was fondling his love-tool until it was thick, hard, and ever-so-fuckable. "Sean, could I?" I asked, trying to look all innocent as I pulled his impressive prize from his pants.

"Whatttttttttttt..." was all he could moan as I began to stroke him into a full erection.

I then lay down on a reclining lawn chair, spreading my legs wide and welcoming him inside. "Come over here, big boy," I beckoned. "Let tasty Tea make you feel soooo much better."

He couldn't refuse as we began to thoroughly fuck. We broke the lawn chair as he was pumping his hips furiously while releasing a steady stream of sperm into my wet vagina. "Ohhhh!" he cried out as I was screaming at the top of my lungs. I couldn't help it. I couldn't stop _screaming_...

It didn't even matter at that point if my husband heard. I didn't care. I loved being fucked ... and I loved to scream. As Sean spilled the last of his sizzling seed into my body, my husband wandered out of the house and into the garden.

"What the HELL?!" Victor exclaimed. "You just had sex with Sean, my body guard?"

I couldn't help but grin. Wasn't it obvious?! "Yes, I had sex with him... and it was _good_!" I answered. "And don't you dare say a word! I know you masturbate while thinking of Marty Saybrooke!"

"I do not!" Victor bellowed, but I could tell by his expression that his words were a bold-faced lie.

"Yes, you do! And you moan, 'Marty, ohhhh Marty, your breasts are soooo yummy and good!'"

"I never said that," Victor denied. "That... that was Todd."

"It was you!" I screamed.

Sean got dressed all of the sudden, disappearing after a lame apology. After he left, Victor and I resumed fighting again. "Speaking of Todd, you should just go back to him. You're not welcome here anymore. You're nothing but a screaming little slut!" Victor exclaimed.

"Fine!" I said as I went into the house, showered, and got dressed. I decided I had better things to do... and maybe one of them WAS Todd.

 **Confession Three: I scream in pleasure as I have forbidden sex with my ex.  
**

I arrived at La Boulie, completely surprising Todd as it was such a late hour. I had been crying. My make-up was smeared all over my face. "What's wrong, Tea?" he asked as he answered the door. My mouth was beginning to water as well as my eyes. My ex was shirtless!

"Your brother is an asshole. He kicked me out!" I screamed.

"That horse's ass!" Todd exclaimed. "How dare he throw you out onto the streets... like some common whore?!"

"Ohhh Todd," I said as I began to sob pathetically, laying my head upon his bare, muscular chest. "If only I had someone to comfort me... someone big and strong... and sexy."

Todd wasn't made of steel. As I began rubbing up to him, he sprang an erection. I lead him over to the loveseat as I continued to tearfully cry upon his chest. When I pushed him down on it and crawled on top of him, he looked a little bit frightened.

"Make me feel better, Todd!" I demanded. "Make me forget Victor!"

"Tea-," he started to protest, but I kissed him, my tongue sliding into his mouth.

"I want you now, Todd," I said in between the kinky kisses. He couldn't help himself; he was unzipping his jeans.

For the third time that night, a boner sprang forth for me to pleasure. "Ohhhh Todd, you know just what I needed to help me feel better,' I said as he raised up my dress and slipped off my panties. A second later, we began to fuck.

And as usual, as soon as he slid his thick protuberance into my tight, sticky hole, I began to scream. I yelled so loud I awakened all of La Boulie. Suddenly Blair was there, snacking Todd upside the head with a broomstick.

"What the hell are you doing, Todd Manning...?" she yelled. "Screwing Tea?!"

"This isn't what it looks like," Todd said as I was humping him.

"You know that it is... and how the hell could you do it? Not without me?" she cried out as she was stripping off her clothes.

She grinned wickedly. We had been lovers for quite some time, but neither Todd nor Victor had known of our affair. It looked like we are about to have our first kinky threesome and Todd was completely unprepared.

 **Confession Four: Threesomes make me scream EXTRA loud!  
**

Todd was stunned as we both started having our way with him. "Tea, Blair... I never knew," he said in surprise as I was going down on Blair, my tongue attacking her burning bush. "Why didn't you two tell me that you liked to savor a taste of the tuna?"

"Tuna!" Blair gasped. She smacked Todd with the broom again, but he didn't seem to mind. In fact, I think he liked it a little rough.

"We've been fucking for weeks... maybe even months... and you and Victor neither one had a clue," I said with a laugh after having licked Blair's labia.

Todd placed his lips on mine, getting a taste his wife's delectable flavor in our kinky kisses. "I think I have died and gone to heaven," he said as he positioned himself to fuck me deeply from behind, while I resumed going to town; munching on Blair.

With each hard thrust, I was SCREAMING, so loud that Dorian awakened, followed by a couple of teenaged kids. They all got an eyeful. "What on God's green earth?" Starr gasped.

"My eyes! My eyes!" Dorian cried out quite dramatically.

And that was all I heard. I was cumming again... and the whole time, I was screaming. After a explosive orgasm, I collapsed. My screaming had caused everyone in the house to have temporary deafness.

When I came to, Todd broke the news to me. "That was a lot of fun... but traumatizing to the kids... as well as Dorian. I am afraid you'll have to go..."

"But what will I do... where will I go?"

"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn," Dorian spoke up as she handed me my clothes. "Just get the hell out of my house... and don't you EVER come back!"

 **Confession Five: I begin the search for a lover who doesn't mind a woman who's a screamer.**

After getting kicked out of LaBoulie, I was wandering the streets again, half-dressed and looking like some sort of hooker. To my dismay, I was picked up by a cop who seemed to think I was a lady of the night.

"Hey, pretty lady, what are you doing out on such a cold, dark night?" he asked as he pulled up in his police car.

To my surprise, it was someone I knew - John McBain, and he was munching on a sandwich.

"Well, my husband kicked me out on the streets because I had sex with his bodyguard. I went over to La Boulie to see my ex, but that ended up in a kinky threesome..." I stated. "I was so loud that they kicked me out, too."

"You poor, sweet little thing," said John. "Are you sure you're not out looking for men? Are you a prostitute? Do I have to arrest you... and strip search you?"

"No!" I cried out. "I do not have sex for money! I do it for FREE!"

"Really? For free?" he asked with interest.

"How much would you do for say...a sandwich?" he asked with a smirk.

"I'd totally do _you_ for a sandwich," I said without hesitation. "Just tell me one thing now. Do you mind a lady who screams?"

"So, you're a screamer, huh?" he asked as he gave me a devilish look. "I don't mind at all. You can scream to your heart's content as I am fucking you repeatedly. Why don't you climb in?"

"Sure," I said as I entered his police car.

"Where can we go... and would you like it if we used your handcuffs?" I asked as he drove away from the curb.

"I can tell we're going to get along famously," said John as he handed me a sandwich which was smeared with his special sauce. "Just you and me..."


	4. Desperately Seeking Semen

**Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap opera and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!**

 _*~Desperately Seeking Semen ~ Remington Steele and Laura Holt (Remington Steele)~*  
_

Laura Holt was desperately seeking a large specimen of semen! Her desire for jism escalated with her mother's numerous phone calls regarding Laura's sister Frances and her various pregnancies and the subsequent births of her beautiful and absolutely amazing children. So far Frances and her husband Donald were the proud parents of the following children - Donald Jr AKA D.J., Danny, Denise, Dennis, David, Darlene, and Little Freddie. However, Frances happened to be two years older than Laura and close to losing her precious fertility. Laura's mother wanted several more grandchildren, so she was pressuring Laura to "get busy." The problem was Laura wasn't dating anyone and the only man she had a romantic inclination toward was her "boss" Mr. Remington Steele... or _whatever_ his real name was (it might be Dougie or Zenos or Harry); Laura wasn't quite sure. All she knew was that her fertility clock was a ticking, sweltering time-bomb- and she had to get pregnant - and RIGHT AWAY!

One hot day in Los Angeles, Laura arrived at the Happy Swimmers Fertility Clinic. It was known for having high quality semen for any sort of insemination. Laura took a seat in the waiting room, eager to spread her legs wide for the upCUMing procedure.

As Laura was flipping through a magazine called _Breastfeeding and the Newly Inseminated Mother_ , a nurse called out her name. "Hey, Miss Holt, it's time for you to get your injection!" the nurse exclaimed.

"Ohhh, I have been waiting so long for this," Laura said as she stood up. She was feeling just a bit nervous. It wasn't often that she spread her legs, not for any reason! The past three years of working alongside the sexy Mr. Remington Steele, the two had flirted, kissed and intimately caressed, but she had never managed to get him into bed... not even after their MANY tries. Somehow, someway, they'd always been interrupted, usually by a case or one of Laura's mother's many phone calls.

As she was walking down the corridor, following the scatterbrained nurse, Laura was thinking of her luscious employer. She had created him. As a female detective, she wasn't getting many cases, so she had made up the infamous Mr. Remington Steele, a masculine hunk of a man. Then one day he just showed up at the office, ready and willing to assume the role. It had to have been fate.

*Ohhh why - ohhh why is my mind on Mr. Steele, when I am about to get injected with some unknown man's sperm?!* Laura fretted.

She bit her lower lip as the nurse lead her toward a room where she was to have the procedure. "Just go into the room, take off all of your clothes and spread your legs wide upon the exam table," the nurse instructed.

"Sure, no problem," Laura said with a gulp. It sounded so sterile... and completely without feeling. Laura began to wonder - was she at the right place... and at the right time?!

As she walked into the semi-dark exam room, Laura got the shock of her life. The nurse must have lead her to the wrong room! A man was seated facing the window AND he was trying without success to bring his thick, impressive manhood to life. No matter how hard he stroked, the poor guy couldn't seem to get an erection!

"Ohhh my gosh!" Laura gasped, feeling quite sorry for the unfortunate guy. After all, from the back, he seemed like quite a stud, with thick dark hair, an impressive, muscular body, and such lean, toned skin. As she watched, she couldn't keep her eyes of his...

*Wait a minute!* she was thinking. *No wonder he looks so good...That's- that's...*

At that moment, the man turned around. "Mr. Steele!" Laura cried out. "What are YOU doing here?"

"Would you believe me if I said I am on a case?" Remington asked, trying to look nonchalant, even though he had his king-sized, semi-erect love tool in his grip. "What in the WORLD are you doing here?"

"I came for a... a..." Laura didn't know what to say. Her eyes were on Remington's cock and it was starting to grow to the greatest of proportions.

"For a ... what?" he asked.

"An injection," she admitted, almost in a hiss. "I am desperately seeking semen. I need it... I need it ... so bad."

"Why?" he asked. "Why didn't you tell me... about - about this matter?"

"Well, Frances keeps getting pregnant all the time... and mother keeps calling," Laura said quietly as all she could do was watch in fascination as Remington continued to stroke his meat. "I... I wanted to have a baby, too."

"Really?" he asked in surprise.

"Yes, really. My biological clock is ticking so fast. If I don't get pregnant now, I might never get the chance."

"What a shame, Laura... if you don't get pregnant. You see, I wanted to leave a little piece of myself in this world, a part of me for generations to come, incase I never marry or have any children..."

"Ohhh that's so sweet of you," she said as she watched a drop of pearly-white cum arise and come to rest at the tip of his erection.

"But I seem to be having a problem. The kinky movies didn't help... nor did the naughty magazines. I just can't get hard!" he cried out.

"You seem to be hard now, Mr. Steele," Laura pointed out.

Remington looked down at his thick cock in which he had been absently stroking while talking to Laura. Sure enough it was as hard as steel.

"Why Mr Steele," said Laura with a smirk. "I do believe you have an erection."

"Correct as usual, Miss Holt," he returned.

"The nurse told me to come into this room, lie down on the exam table and after I got myself undressed, I was to wait for my injection," she said as she approached Remington. She began to boldly caress his muscular chest, feeling his muscles ripple with every stroke across his rigid flesh.

"You better obey the nurse, Laura," Remington said. "We wouldn't want you to miss your - your _hot beef_ injection."

Laura grinned as she started to remove her clothing, piece by piece. Remington's eyes were on her perky breasts, her lovely ass as well, plus all of her other sexy attributes. As she lay down on the exam table, parting her legs ever-so-wide, he went to stand at the end of the table, gazing down at her in wonder.

"I never pictured it would happen this way, Laura," he said while the tip of his erection was seeking out her warm, wet hole.

"Yes, I imagined it would be more romantic... like in the back of your limo or something," she said as she moved her hips closer to the edge of the table- toward the object of her desire which was his throbbing love-pole.

"Or in front of the office... in view of the fountain..."

"I want a fountain of your sperm inside of me!" she spoke with excitement.

"Hey, look at this way, it might not be as we planned it, but at least we aren't getting interrupted. Not yet anyway."

"Then quit talking and give me your semen!" she exclaimed.

Remington was quick to comply. In an instant, he had slid his thickness deep into her feminine channel, filling her up completely with his hard weapon. He began to fuck her with it furiously. She screamed as they were both cumming... and cumming... and cumming.

They came so much that they were both soaked in each other's love juices. Laura loved every moment of it as the now satisfied Remington Steele pulled free from her body.

That's when the nurse entered the room, carrying a small specimen cup overflowing with fresh sperm. "What just happened in here?" she asked in a state of shock, her eyes wide as she saw two naked people, obviously in a state of sexual bliss.

"I already had my injection," Laura told the nurse. "Save that for another needy woman."

The nurse just shook her head; dazed, and walked out of the room. Remington and Laura laughed, then he kissed her tenderly on the lips.

"Ahhhh, Laura. You should have told me you were wanting my sample. I've been saving it a long time, hoping I could give it to you."

She smiled at him as he took her hands in his. He helped her sit up on the table.

"You know what this means, don't you?"  
she asked.

He raised one eyebrow, because she knew she was going to tell him. "If I am pregnant, Mother will expect us to get married."

"But I don't even know my real name!" he cried out.

"I know, but I love you anyway."

Love - a word that had never been used in their relationship, but there it was... lying out on the table for all to see, much like his cock had been a few minutes earlier.

"Laura," he said, his voice becoming tender as he looked at her in adoration. "I want to give you what you need... what you deserve."

"I think you just did," she said as she returned his amorous gaze. She reached up to softly kiss him.

"What will we tell Mildred?" he asked as he hunted for their strewn clothing.

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it," she said. "Right now, I am just going to tell her I got inseminated at the fertility clinic... all of which is true. We'll let her solve that particular little mystery."

He chuckled. "I love how your mind works," he said with a sexy smirk.

Soon they were both dressed and ready to leave the clinic. "Where will we go... and what will we do?" he asked.

"Can we go back to your place?" she suggested. "I was hoping we could do each other."

He loved the sound of that. "I will turn off the phone and I promise to lock the door."

Laura was ecstatic. "Excellent plan, Mr. Steele." 


	5. Everyone I Did Last Summer - The Documen

**Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap opera and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!**

 _*~Everyone I Did Last Summer - The Documentary (John McBain ~ One Life to Live)~*_

 _(The following comes as a voice-over in narration of the documentary - Everyone I Did Last Summer starring the infamous John McBain of Llanview, Pennsylvania.)_

It's a joke around Llanview that I have the brains of a chimp along with a wandering penis. Well, what (or who) I did last summer definitely proves it. The problem is that someone found out about my many liaisons. Now I am being blackmailed and I am afraid I might lose my job on the police force. If I lose my job, I won't be able to perform strip searches anymore! And I absolutely love those deep and rough body cavity searches!

It all started with a note on my desk at work. I was minding my own business, thinking of a good x-rated film I might like to watch after a long, grueling day of work when I discovered the note. It started out with - I know who you did last summer...

Then the note went into all this graphic detail. "John McBain, I have been watching you. I know everyone you've been fucking. Let me start in early June of last summer. You were at Rodi's, tending the bar... but when your patrons weren't looking, you had a few beers. You were rather drunk... but not too drunk to fuck. You ended up seducing sweet, young, innocent Natalie Buchanan. When Rodi's cleared out and everyone went home, you asked Natalie to stay and you said, "I have always admired you and your impressive jumbos." You ripped open her dress and proceeded to fuck her deep and hard on the pool table. After you pulled out, you said, "I hope you are using birth control, because I just like to fuck; I don't want any children." You never gave Natalie the time of day again. You are nothing more than a stupid, lustful, selfish asshole. I am going to make you pay for what you did. I know WHO you did last summer!"

Of course I was shaking in my boxers after reading that particular note. Every single word spoke with precise detail of my encounter with Natalie Buchanan in early June of last summer. I was afraid that whoever sent the note might really know of ALL of my sexual crimes... even the ones I had with myself in the dark!

Trying to calm myself, I was hoping it was just a one time occurrence and I would never get one of those notes again. But... I was wrong. So wrong! Not even the next day, I found another note - this time slipped under my door. I opened it up to read these words-

"I know who you did last summer...John McBain, I have been watching you. I know everyone you've been fucking. After you left Rodi's that fateful night, you ended up in the parking lot. You saw Natalie's sister, Jessica getting into her car, except it wasn't really Jessica, it was her sleazy alter, Tess. You asked Tess to climb into your truck with you and give you a blow job. Tess, who is quite the whore, jumped into your truck as you released your throbbing demon. She went down on you, not even knowing that you had just had wild sex with her sister, Natalie. You are nothing more than a stupid, lustful, selfish asshole. I am going to make you pay for what you did. I know WHO you did last summer!"

I started to whimper after reading the note. Someone knew all my secrets and everyone I had been screwing. I had a feeling maybe someone was pregnant and about to accuse me of being the baby's father. After all, I had fucked almost every woman in Llanview and a few in Port Charles as well. Surely not all those women I had been having unprotected sex with had been using birth control. It had been exactly one year since the first sex act that had mentioned in the letters. Were my suspicions correct - was I a dad?!

As the days passed, more and more letters came. Dozens of them. I lost track. I had a whole pile of them. I kept them in the bedroom and would read them as I masturbated, thinking of all of the sexy women I had plundered.

I would just pick a random note up, reading the lustful tale in vivid detail. I would stroke my meat as I remembered the kinky sex.

One in particular stands out. It read-

"I know who you did last summer...John McBain, I have been watching you. I know everyone you've been fucking. It was a warm day in July when you invited Blair Cramer over to your place. You made her promises of love and marriage and then when she thought she had your undying affection, you whipped out your great big plumper and began to woe her with it. Blair was so smitten that she bent over the back of your couch and you took her from behind, thrusting into her over and over again until she orgasmed. You wiped your sperm on her asscheek, saying she was your one and only, but you lied. You are nothing more than a stupid, lustful, selfish asshole. I am going to make you pay for what you did. I know WHO you did last summer!"

After that spectacular evening with Blair, we were wed. It was a private ceremony, of course. My other lovers couldn't find out that I was a married man. I wanted a lot of action on the side... and boy, did I GET it. All summer long, I fucked and fucked. I don't want to brag, but all I had to do was gaze into a woman's eyes and she was begging to go to bed with me. When my wife was asleep, I made sure I had plenty of sex.

Whoever was writing the letters knew all of that, too. He or she knew everything about me... and who I had fucked. They had every detail... as if they had actually been there, filming. Just the thought of my sexcapades possibly being on film made me horny. I was always horny. The truth was, I was a sex addict. My name is John McBain and I am a sex addict. I love women and I love sex.

The next letter arrived and it said:

"I know who you did last summer...John McBain, I have been watching you. I know everyone you've been fucking. Even though you had a beautiful woman as your wife, you decided to cheat on her. Your wandering penis took you to your next lover. You set your sights on the lovely Miss Marty Saybrooke. First you made a big show of rescuing her... then you took her back to your place, so you could 'comfort' her. You stripped her naked and sniffed every inch of her luscious, sexy body. You licked her wet pussy until she came in your mouth. After you fucked her deep and hard, you said, "I can't be with you. My heart belongs to Blair." Marty's heart was torn asunder, but you didn't care, because are nothing more than a stupid, lustful, selfish asshole. I am going to make you pay for what you did. I know WHO you did last summer!"

After my fantastic fuck with Marty and watching her cry in desperation because I refused to leave her for my wife, I was beginning to run out of single women to fuck in Llanview. I decided to set my sights on a married woman, someone I could conquer. Danger was a rush (or a sexual high), thinking I might just get caught by her husband in the act of plundering his wife. One day I was listening in on a conversation that my buddy Bo Buchanan was having with his wife, the sexy Nora. They appeared to be having some sort of disagreement. As Bo left his office in a huff, it was just my chance. *I'm going to bang Nora Buchanan,* I was thinking. My pecker was swelled to great proportions at just the thought of it.

I walked in asking Nora if she was alright. I proceeded to comfort her hard and deep with my super-long cock. After it was over, she lay across Bo's desk in shock, as if she couldn't believe that she had just cheated on her husband, the exalted Bo Buchanan. "You've just cheated with the very best, babe," I proclaimed, wiping the sperm from my dick on her highly-raised dress. I hadn't even bothered to strip her completely naked - just pushed up her dress and tore off her panties. I had been in such a hurry to sink my thick cock into her fine little ass.

She slapped me for my pompous words, but it was worth it. Damn, was it ALL worth it! Every thrust into a woman's body - it was my highest thrill. The more women the better!

Whoever was sending the letters knew about my encounter with Nora as well as the next one... and the next one. Everyone I fucked last summer, they knew! The letters kept coming and coming... Just as much as I had cummed. There was a letter to match every single sex act.

After Nora, I was starting to get a bad reputation, although the men in Llanview seemed oblivious to the fact that I had inserted my cock into almost every lady I had set my eyes upon. The women were scarcer than ever. I was starting to get desperate. So I made up a batch of my famous sandwiches and went looking for a lovely lady who may want to share something tasty and fulfilling with me.

A letter came that described what happened that warm summer day. It read-

"I know who you did last summer...John McBain, I have been watching you. I know everyone you've been fucking. After making sandwiches and eating them lewdly in the park, you seduced a sexy female by the name of Tea DelGado. You took her into the ladies restroom at the park, where you proceeded to make her eat your cock as well as one of your sandwiches covered in your special sauce. After she deepthroated your banana, you pushed her up against the wall. After you were done fucking her thoroughly, your sperm was dripping out of her well-lubricated hole. But you didn't get enough. You never get enough. You only wanted more, because you are nothing more than a stupid, lustful, selfish asshole. I am going to make you pay for what you did. I know WHO you did last summer!"

The letters were really starting to get to me, because who cares if I was a sex-crazed lunatic? All of the women were ready and willing! In fact, many begged for more, but I always used my wife as an excuse, the lovely Blair. I wanted as many conquests as possible! Fucking them more than once wouldn't have been any fun, so I was always looking for more. My hungry cock was craving more... so I went looking for it. I didn't have to look too far.

What happened next was the encounter that ruined my marriage. Blair caught me having sex with a very drunk Roxie. She walked in as I was thrusting my hips and Roxie was crying out her immense joy of having an orgasm. "John McBain, it's over. We're through. Get the fuck out!" Blair screamed.

Roxie had just left LaBoulie, half naked. "Why, what's wrong?" I asked nonchalantly.

"I'm done with you!" Blair screamed.

"But I haven't had sex with Dorian yet!" I protested.

She slapped me and threatened to harm my penis. I had no choice but to pack my bags and leave... but where would I go? Then I remembered my fun times in Port Charles. I would go back there... and have a little more fun. But who would I fuck first... Carly or the lovely Sam? Maybe we'd have a threesome. Ohhh hell, I wanted to fuck Elizabeth, too... if only she wasn't so damn fertile!

I arrived in Port Chuck carrying my bag of belongings. I got a room in the sleazy motel and began calling around for a woman to visit me. As I waited for the first one to cum by, I was stroking my big, thick penis. It was craving wild sex.

"Who's there?" I called out when someone knocked upon the door.

I wondered which one of my women might cum by first.

The person who sent the letters knew exactly who I fucked that summer day in Port Charles. The letter read-

"I know who you did last summer...John McBain, I have been watching you. I know everyone you've been fucking. Even though you had a beautiful woman as your wife, you decided to cheat on her. Your wandering penis took you to many lovers. You cheated on her with Tea, Marty, and Nora as well as several other beautiful babes. When Blair found out that you were a swine, she kicked you to the curb, but that didn't stop your lust. Ohhh no! You took it to Port Charles, New York and to Sam McCall, who happens to be married to ex-assassin Jason Morgan. You didn't even care if he could blow your dick away with a single shot - you had to have her! And have her you did! You fucked her in the shower, on the balcony, and as if that wasn't enough, you fucked her that squeaky old bed in that sleazy, roach-infested motel. You are nothing more than a stupid, lustful, selfish asshole. I am going to make you pay for what you did. I know who you did last summer!"

After reading that particular letter, I was furious. I was sick of the semi-threatening notes that had exposed all of my kinky secrets. I just wanted whoever it was to confront me in person, because there wasn't any more sex acts I had been involved in... at least not last summer. All the rest had happened in the fall... or shortly thereafter.

I walked out into the woods, carrying the stack of letters. I was going to burn them and be done with them, when suddenly a van pulled up and a whole bunch of people got out. Out popped Marty, Natalie, Blair, Stacy, Kim, Tea, Sam, Roxie, Nora and all the rest of the women I had did last summer.

"What are you doing here?" I asked as I held the incriminating letters.

"You have the brains of a chimp along with a wandering penis," said Sam who was the spokeswoman for the crowd of women. "We want you to pay for what you did. You'll be sorry for what you did to us."

"For what you did to all of us," said Nora.

"What did I do?" I asked nonchalantly.

"You know exactly what you did," said Blair with fury. "And you're going to pay for it."

Jason Morgan jumped out of the van and he held a semi-automatic weapon against the crotch of my pants. "You're not going anywhere," the ex-assassin threatened. "We know WHO you did last summer."

Suddenly Victor Lord Junior came from out of nowhere and grabbed me in a vice grip. I couldn't leave, even if I wanted to.

"What... what are you going to do to me?" I asked in fear.

"You have to serve the rest of this year as a sex slave," Roxy said, her words slurred as she was drunk as usual.

I laughed. "That's no punishment!"

"To me," said a man as he approached me.

Ohhh holy hell! It was Todd Manning and he was pissed. It was he who had wrote the letters. "You hurt all the women I care about... and I am going to make you pay for it. Pull down your pants!" Todd yelled.

"Do it!" said Jason as he still had the weapon aimed at my love-tool.

I had no other choice but to pull down my pants and boxers as they all laughed at my frightened and shrivelled up pecker. "Please don't hurt my penis," I begged pathetically.

"No one is going to hurt your penis. As long as you pleasure me with it," Todd said in a sexy slur.

"Really? I have to be your sex slave?" I said, feeling more than a little frightened.

"Yeah, I will treat you right... but I will teach you a lesson or two," Todd replied. "You will now call me Master."

"Okay... Master," I said reluctantly. "Can you please tell Sam's husband to remove the tip of his gun from my cock?"

Todd gestured to Jason who moved back a few inches, removing the threat to my shrinking privates. "You don't have an erection now, do you?" Todd said venomously.

"Victor, load him in the van... and take him to my mansion. It's time for his _lessons_ ," Todd said to his twin brother.

"No!" I cried out half-heartedly, because I did want to see what those lessons entailed. I had never fucked a guy before... but maybe it was time I got the experience. I had already had plenty of women.

So for the rest of the year, I served as Todd Manning's personal sex slave. It was an experience for another time and another story. I must go now as I am experiencing tormenting rectal pain.

Good night!


	6. From Beer to Paternity

_Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap opera and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!_

 ***~From Beer to Paternity - (Jimmy Chance ~ Raising Hope)~***

It all started when his parents sent him out in the family van for a quick beer run. "Get whatever's cheap," his mom said as she pressed a few dollars into his hand.

"Okay, Mom. I will be back in less than a half hour," Jimmy promised.

"Hurry up," Jimmy's father urged. "We want to get MawMaw drunk and send her off to bed."

MawMaw was Jimmy's great-great grandmother. She was as old as dirt and half the time, she seemed to think that Jimmy was her long-lost husband who had died decades ago. It was really awkward! He avoided her as much as possible, but she was a part of the family... his crazy, messed-up family.

He didn't know it, but his life was about to get crazier - a hell of a lot crazier! Jimmy drove the van toward Howdy's the only grocery store in town. He had just enough cash to buy some cheap beer. He placed the cold ones on the conveyor belt as he checked out the hot check-out girl. He'd had a crush on Sabrina since he was a teen with long, unruly hair and exotic make-up all over his face. He always got all tongue-tied when he was anywhere near her.

"So are you gonna get drunk tonight?" Sabrina asked.

"Yeah, the whole family is," Jimmy said with a grin. "Even MawMaw."

Sabrina just smirked. She knew Jimmy's family well. They were an odd bunch, but intriguing. Sabrina secretly had a crush on Jimmy, too, but hadn't asked him out yet. She had secrets she was keeping from everyone who knew her.

"Well, have a fun night," Sabrina said after Jimmy paid for the beer.

*I'd have a spectacular night if I could spend it with you,* Jimmy was thinking as he left the grocery store.

He headed back out to the van and placed the beer in between the beat-up bucket seats. He had just started the vehicle when a sexy blond jumped into the passenger side and slammed the door. "Drive!" she screamed.

Jimmy saw a man running at a quick speed toward the van. Assumingly he was coming after the woman who had just entered his van. "Who are you ... and what's going on?" he asked in confusion.

"Just drive! Please! Before he catches up to us!"

Jimmy had no other choice but to drive away, his tires screeching on the pavement. The woman, who he learned was named Lucy, opened one of the beers. She was chugging it down as the man chased after them on foot.

"Who's the guy?" Jimmy asked.

"My ex-boyfriend," she stated.

"Why is he-?" Jimmy began to question, but Lucy handed him a beer.

"Drink up. You're cute," she stated.

After awhile, they outran the guy, but Jimmy was still driving like a maniac. All the adrenaline had made him thirsty. Like Lucy, he was chugging down the beers. *My parents are going to be sooo mad,* he was thinking. *How will they ever get MawMaw to go to bed?*

The beer was gone and the cans were littering the van. "Pull over," Lucy insisted as they came to a dark lot on the edge of town.

"Why?" asked Jimmy. He was so drunk he couldn't even think straight. He wasn't even sure where he was at that point.

"I'm horny," she said.

After Jimmy pulled over, she crawled into his lap. "You're going to be my next boyfriend," she said as she was raising her skirt.

Jimmy couldn't stop himself as she unzipped his jeans and tugged on his growing erection. He grabbed her firm ass as they began to screw like animals in the front seat of his parents van. After he orgasmed inside her, he said, "Thank God we didn't get caught by the police."

"Let's go back to your place and fuck some more," she suggested.

"Sure," he said as she climbed off his lap and he restarted the van. He didn't even bother to zip up his pants. All the way back to the home where lived with his parents and great-great grandmother, Lucy fondled his pecker.

He was rather drunk when he crawled in through his bedroom window and Lucy followed after him. "We have to be really quiet. I think my parents and MawMaw are sleeping."

"You still live with your parents?" she asked him with a sexy smirk.

"Yeah, why not... I can't afford rent on my salary. I am a lawn boy."

"What the hell is a lawn boy?"

"I mow lawns and clean pools and stuff."

"Glamourous," she said. "Let's fuck."

Jimmy had never got lucky so many times in one night. After awhile, he passed out on her. Lucy was deepy disappointed. She could have gone all night.

When Jimmy's parents awoke the next morning, they found him in the kitchen, making Lucy some breakfast. All Jimmy knew how to cook was toast. After it popped out of the toaster, he began to butter it for her.

"Hurry up," she said impatiently. She was hungry from all the sex.

Virginia and Bert, Jimmy's parents, looked at the scenario suspiciously. "Jimmy, why didn't you come back with the beer last night?" his dad asked.

"And who's this... this woman?" Virginia asked, looking at loose Lucy in disgust.

"Mom, Dad... meet my new girlfriend, Lucy."

"Hi," Lucy said to them, grinning over her plate of toast.

"Just a minute. I gotta piss." Lucy stood up and left the room.

Virginia was looking at the TV set on the counter in a state of shock. A news bulletin popped up about a serial killer. "If you see this woman, do not approach her. She's extremely dangerous," the broadcaster said.

"Ohhh my God!" Virginia gasped when she saw the woman's picture. It was Lucy, Jimmy's new girlfriend! She was known as the notorious Boyfriend Killer.

Bert and Jimmy were also staring at the screen. Jimmy couldn't believe he had been having hot, kinky sex with a serial killer.

Lucy came back into the room and sat down at the table. "That's so much better," she said. "That beer went straight to my bladder..."

Before she could say another word, Virginia picked up the TV set, bashing Lucy over the head. And that was that.

Lucy was taken to prison and after a trial, she was put on death row. Jimmy tried to put all that craziness behind him, until the day the letter came. It was from Lucy.

 _"Jimmy, My Love,_

 _I need you to come to the prison to see me. I have a little something for you._

 _Love Always (or until I get the lethal injection),  
Lucy"_

Jimmy reluctantly went to the prison to meet with Lucy and to his shock and surprise, he found out she was heavily pregnant. "It's yours," she said. "I know they won't kill me in six months... not when I have just given birth to a tiny baby."

But Lucy was wrong; she got the electric chair, not the lethal injection as she had predicted in her letter. Although he had no experience whatsoever with kids, he suddenly had custody of his infant daughter, a beautiful little girl that Lucy had named Princess Beyonce.

When he took the baby in his arms, she immediately threw up on him. Jimmy looked down into the sweet blue eyes of his daughter and he made a promise he'd be a good dad to his baby girl, even though he had never planned to be a dad so young... or for the baby's mother to be a murderer.

"Don't worry, Princess Beyonce. Daddy's gonna take great care of you," Jimmy said to his little girl.

He took the baby home and introduced her to his parents. "You're not gonna keep it, are you?" his mom said in annoyance.

"It's mom is a serial killer," Jimmy's dad reminded.

"Well, she's my kid and I want to keep her," Jimmy stated.

"You can't be serious! Babies are a lot of responsibility. They poop and pee and spit up a lot!" Virginia exclaimed.

"I know. She's already done all those things... and I still want to keep her," Jimmy said as he held his baby girl.

"What are you gonna call it?" asked Bert.

"I am gonna call _her_ Hope, even though Lucy named her Princess Beyonce. I think that's a dumb name," Jimmy replied.

"Well, if you are really gonna keep _her_ , you'll need to go to the grocery store and get diapers, bottles and all that other baby stuff," Virginia instructed.

Jimmy didn't have a stroller or any other sort of baby equipment, so he placed Hope in a shopping cart on top of a fluffy pillow and headed off toward Howdy's. When he got there, he saw Sabrina. "Who's baby is that?" she asked. "Did you steal it?"

"No," he said. "She's the kid I had with a serial killer."

"Groovy," Sabrina said.

"So what do babies need, besides diapers and bottles?"

"I can help with that," Sabrina said as she lead him to the baby equipment.

With Sabrina's assistance, he found everything his baby girl could possibly need. When Sabrina rung it all up, he nearly crapped his pants. He had to give her his last dollar to cover all the expense. "Wow, that beer I had that night turned out to be terribly expensive, even if it was the cheap stuff," he said under his breath.

"Yeah, but she's definitely worth it," Sabrina said as she looked down at the cute little girl.

When Jimmy saw Sabrina looking at Hope with a gorgeous smile, he fell in love with her even deeper. "Hey, do you want to go out on a date with me sometime?" he daringly asked her. "I promise, I won't get you drunk... or pregnant..."

Sabrina laughed. "That's okay... I'm on the pill. Of course, I would love to go out with you."

"Great, but you'll have to pay, because I'm broke now."

"That won't be a problem," she said, because Jimmy still didn't know her secret. Sabrina was the daughter of a millionaire, but she just wanted to live like an average person. She wanted a family - a family just like Jimmy's. And she wanted a cute little girl to love - just like Jimmy's baby daughter Hope.

Sabrina gave Jimmy a sexy wink as he wheeled the cart away containing his daughter and all the bags of numerous baby articles. He was a dad now. His night with a serial killer had given him the greatest gift of all. And now a date with Sabrina, his secret crush, would be the icing on the cake! 


	7. Genital Hospital

_Author's Note: This will be a series of drabbles and short chapters based off characters from various soap opera and primetime fandoms. I don't own any of the fandoms or the characters. This was written for entertainment only!_

 ***~Genital Hospital - (Epiphany, Alexis/Julian, Ava/Griffin, and AJ/Carly ~ General Hospital)~***

My name is Epiphany Johnson and I have worked as a nurse at Genital Hospital for the past 11 years. Throughout the years of caring for various patients, I must admit that I have had some wild and crazy experiences.

It all started a few years ago, when I was making my rounds on the fifth floor of the hospital. I walked into a patient's room. Mr. Quartermaine had been in a coma for the past few weeks. His mother, the Chief of Staff at the hospital would have done anything so that her son could survive. Sadly though, her son didn't stand a chance.

Here's what happened:

As I walked closer to the patient's hospital room, I could hear erotic moans coming from inside. I stood in the doorway, wondering what my course of action should be, because after all the patient was in a coma and incapable of such passionate activity... or so I thought.

I don't like anyone messing with my patients and causing them any sort of distress, so I summoned all my courage and just walked right in there, ready to give whoever was moaning in MY patient's room a piece of my mind. Never would I believed what it was I witnessed when I entered that room!

Carly Corinthos, the patient's ex was naked as the day she was born. She was on top of the patient, making hot, passionate love to him even though he was comatose! "Ohhh AJ, give it to me good!" she was screaming as she rode him like a wild pony. "Give me your big, throbbing plumper! I want it ALL!"

I was as shocked as could be, because despite his unconscious state, the patient had a pretty impressive boner. "What the HELL do you think you're doing to MY patient?!" I screamed.

"Find your own guy!" Carly shouted back. "This one's mine!"

She then proceeded to fuck him thoroughly, even though he wasn't able to return the enthusiasm. The patient's heart monitor however was off the charts with activity as she screamed out in pleasure. After her obvious orgasm, she climbed off the patient, then began to suckle his thick, stiffened hunk of man-meat. She was determined to make him cum, but sadly, no matter how much Mrs. Corinthos sucked, the patient could not reach ecstasy.

"Dammit!" she yelled unhappily. "I guess I gave him too much viagra!"

"You gave a comatose patient viagra?!" I exclaimed. "What the HELL were you thinking?"

"I thought it would arouse him, then he'd wake up," Carly stated.

"AJ, wake up," she said as she was nudging his protruding dick.

"Get the hell away from the patient!" I said as I slapped her with the patient's medical chart. "Find someone responsive to use for your lust!"

I bonked her on the head a couple of times and threw her out of the room. Looking at my patient, I wondered what to do about his oversized cock. If his boner didn't disappear soon, it was sure to upset his mother, Dr. Monica Quartermaine when she came in to visit her son.

I covered it with blankets and pillows until the viagra could wear off. I never told a soul what I saw in that hospital room that day. But unbelievably, that was just the first of strange occurrences to cum...

A few weeks later, Julian Jerome, a former mob boss was hospitalized for injuries he had received due to his violent lifestyle. I try not to make judgments about my patients and their choices, but Mr. Jereme was a difficult patient at best. He kept begging me to give him a sponge bath and a couple of times when I entered his hospital room, he pulled the covers off his lower body, showing me his blazing erection.

"Come over here, Epiphany, and give me some sugar," he said with a sexy smile.

I must admit, I was flattered by Mr. Jerome's attraction to me and almost gave in to my urges. He must have gotten bored though when I didn't reciprocate, because not even a day later, I went in to give him his daily enema and discovered he wasn't alone.

"What the fuck?!" I cried out in shock.

His ex-wife Alexis Davis was dressed up in a sexy, little nurse uniform and she was giving Mr. Jerome a sponge bath.

"He's been begging to be bathed, but all the nurses have refused him," said Alexis as she was stroking his throbbing cock with a washcloth.

"Ohhh yeah! YESSSSSSSSSSS! Alexis, I'm cumming!" the patient cried out as he began to spill his seed.

A torrent of hot sperm spilled from the tip of his cock. Alexis licked it up with her tongue as she continued to clean the patient.

After it was over, Mr. Jerome had a huge grin on his face. "I am feeling so much better," he said. "Can I be released from the hospital now?"

"No," I said firmly. "Turn over! It's time for your emema!"

"Holy hell, don't let her do it, Alexis," Mr. Jerome pleaded pathetically as he held onto his ex. "It hurts my sphincter."

"You certainly weren't thinking about your sphincter a few minutes ago, were you?" I said huffily. "Now spread those cheeks!"

It was a difficult process, but with the help of the patient's ex, I managed to give Mr. Jerome his enema. "Thanks for your help," I told her. "You should really think about changing professions. You'd make an excellent nurse."

She laughed softly and said, "If the doctor agrees to releasing him, I am planning to be his **private** nurse. He can have all the sponge baths he's been begging for."

"Good luck with the enemas then," I said before leaving the patient's room.

I could go on and on about all the sexual pandemonium I have witnessed at Genital Hospital, but my most recent experience involved a doctor who also claims to be a priest. He hasn't been keeping his vow of chastity all that well, considering he was recently accused of impregnating a woman by the name of Claudette, but that really isn't any of **my** business, BUT what happens in MY hospital is!

I was walking by the hospital chapel when I heard a woman's voice cry out, "Lick my hairy, burned vagina!"

I couldn't stop myself. I just HAD to investigate. Now I wish I hadn't.

There was Doctor Monro, the doctor/priest, nibbling on his former patient's clit. The patient happens to be the sister of Julian Jerome. I guess horniness must run in the family!

Ava was naked, her legs spread extra-wide on the altar as Dr. Monro was munching on her sticky slit. My eyes were huge as I got my first sight of her naked body.

Due to a fiery accident, the patient's sex organs looked like they had been placed in the deep fryer at a fast food restaurant. Her breasts were saggy and covered with deep, ugly burns. Shockingly, her vagina resembled a deep, black hole with enormous, crinkled skin. I recoiled at the sight as Dr. Monro was feasting on her as though she were a delectable treat.

"Holy Vagina, Batman!" I heard myself calling out in surprise.

The priest/doctor looked up, his ex-patient's hot juices smeared all over his face. "She tastes just like chicken!" he uttered. "Finger-lickin' good."

After seeing that incident in the chapel, I realized that no sex act was off-limits at Genital Hospital. For the rest of my career, I am going to see many other kinky antics, so why not join in on all of the fun?!

I have my eye on the sexy Dr. Finn who is mourning the recent loss of his girlfriend. When he's unsuspecting, I am going to corner him in the laboratory to see if he's ready and willing to play. Wish me luck! I haven't had sex in a couple of decades.


End file.
